Believe or not..

Never listen to what people said
Never listen to one side of stories
Never listen with your ears
But listen and see with your heart
Just follow your gut feeling and justify yourself
Do thing with right attitude and I believe people will appreciate it

July

First six months of the year has been passed. It is now JULY.

What was your greatest success in the first six months of the year?

For me, this year definitely a fruitful year. A lot of events happen in this year. Soon, I will be going to enter a new phase of life - get married. This is my dream since I was a kid. For me, the biggest success of a woman is to get married and have few kids, to have own family. I admit I'm a family kind of women and not a strong woman who pursuing in career development.

However, I still make sure that I'm doing my best on my job. I have been working for 3.5 years in my first company. I had leave in Feb and joined my current company. I am grateful that I had passed my probation period one month ago. It is still long journey in learning new knowledge and apply to my job. To be honest, recently has been quite hectic. I hope I can manage well. Some colleagues starting tender, make me doubt that how long can I still survive here. Pray for everything will be smooth.

Recently, craving for a lot of food made me put on weight. Is time to on diet so that I can fit on the beautiful wedding gown.

Life goes on. What I can do is to be stronger.

Raining Evening

It was a heavy raining evening today. The wind mostly blew away my umbrella. It's cold and wet. I shall not think anything today and have a good sleep =)

What's wrong with me

Lately, I found myself have bad temper. I just couldn't control myself and keep throwing temper to my loved one. I knew I shouldn't, but somehow it just happened. Sometimes, I was depressed.

Perhaps, it was because I am too stress on my work. I felt that I can't master well on my new job although I strive hard to improve and adsorb as much as possible but it seems still can't hit my superior's expectation.

Sometimes, I felt lonely stay in Singapore, be apart with my loved one. I have to be independent and to corp with the issues that I face on a day to day basis. I hope I can slow down my pace and enjoy the precious time without thinking or worrying too much for my future or career. But the reality is you just can't stop or slow down if you want to survive in the first world country, the environment will keep pushing you to move forward and achieve a new height.

I felt envy to my friends who can pursue their dreams with doing the thing they like without care about how other people think about you. It takes courage I agreed. I am just not the person who are brave and willing to take risk, I afraid if I made a wrong decision, it will affects my portfolio, I just worry too much about every little things surrounding me, which is not good I knew.

I need to let go of perfect. Nothing is perfect in this world, same goes to human being, I shouldn't control so much and let it be. I have to accept everyone have their strength and weakness. I have to learn shouldn't take life for granted. I have to be grateful. I have to let go the negative thoughts. I need a change!

Just wanted to write down my complicated mindset and refresh my mind. Life goes on, if we can't change the life, we need to change our mind.